Week 6 (2 of 3) My Funeral Speech

A good Free Web Application should be created to help people write funeral speeches, I could not find one, so below is the speech I wrote and delivered at my Dad's Funeral:

Dad, we saw you getting tired and a cure was not to be. 

So, God put his arms around you and whispered “come to me.”

We loved you immensely, but could no longer make you stay.

With tear filled eyes, we watched you pass away.

A humble heart stopped beating and ceased to exist.

You were one of the greatest and will be cheerfully missed.

Your diligent and hardworking hands have been eternally laid to rest.

God broke our hearts, to prove he only takes the best.

Thank you all for taking time out of your busy lives to come here today and pay final respects to my father.  He was a loving husband, father, grandfather, uncle; a hard worker and a true friend to us all.  In a church full of so many great men, he was one of the greatest.  Ben lived life with an unmatched zest for happiness.  His journey through the realm of mortality began in Cork, Ireland with his birth in December of 1948.  Ben lived in Ireland for a couple of years before his parents relocated their budding family to Rhode Island.  He grew up with a family consisting of his father, mother, two brothers and three sisters.  Ben played numerous sports as a child and he exceled in baseball and golf. 

During the Vietnam conflict, Ben enlisted in the United States Army and completed two tours of duty.  At this point in his life, Ben was not yet an American citizen, but he defended America’s freedoms as an Irish national citizen.  After fighting in Vietnam, he separated from the Army and pursued a career in the construction industry of Rhode Island.  During this time, Ben worked as an electrician and also as a mason.  Although he exceled as a construction worker, he truly missed the feeling of being a soldier in the United States Military.  Ben as you all know also had an immense sense of duty and at this time he was not complete with his service to America.  So Ben reenlisted in the Army, was retrained as a ground pounding 11 Bravo and was given orders to report to Fort Riley, Kansas. 

It was because of golf, one of his passions in life, that he came to meet Jill at the Fort Riley Golf Course.  A petit, intelligent, fireball from Quincy Massachusetts, Jill became the love of his life and mother of his children.  They were married and given orders to relocate to Germany.  “Ich komme aus Weisbauden” I come from Weisbauden.  In 1977 I was born in Weisbauden Germany and Ben and Jill began their new adventure of parenthood.  We left Germany and moved to Fort Knox, Kentucky.  The family was blessed with the birth of a daughter, Kellie.  From there we moved again and this time the Army Post was Fort Benning, Georgia.  While they were stationed at Fort Benning Ben and Jill had their last daughter and child, Kerrie.  While we lived at Fort Benning, Ben began his true calling in life.  He became a mentor. 

He wore a round brown, Ben was a drill sergeant and he began molding young men into the future defenders and leaders of our great country.  Whenever he brought up Fort Benning, Ben always spoke about the fact- he was stationed there while Tank and The Green Berets were filmed.  The Green Berets starred Ben’s favorite actor of all time- The Duke, John Wayne.  Once again orders were received and the family was again relocated to Germany.  This time we were sent to Illeshiem, Germany.  This time spent in Germany, is filled with some of my fondest childhood memories.  Almost every weekend we went on Volksmarches or hikes if you will.  We would travel as a family, to a different German town and walk 10 kilometers, during the walk you had a card which was stamped at check points and at the end we received a beer mug, plate, medal, or some other commemorative item naming the town and year of the hike.  We also had a lot of enjoyable times going to see castles, eating at German restaurants, and going to German carnivals.  At this time in his life, my dad was my baseball and basketball coach for organized teams on post.  We left Germany when my Dad received his final duty station orders. 

Those orders were back to where it all started, Fort Riley Kansas.  Then in 1990 we had the scariest event of our lives up to that point occur.  Dad along with many other brave soldiers received orders to go to war during Operation Desert Storm.  He gave me a hug and told me I was the man of the family and to take care of mom and the girls.  I cried as the front door of the house closed, not knowing if I would ever see my dad again.  A year later we met him at a hanger on Marshall Air Field, it was one of the happiest days of our lives, he made it home safe.   After the war, Ben retired as a First Sgt.  In the Army First Sgts are all called “Top” To us he was always our Top Dad.  Shortly after coming home from Desert Storm, Ben began a new phase of his life. 

He became a civilian and the only trades he had, outside of being a solider were construction related.  So like many others in the construction industry already knew, Ben learned you have to go on the road, to follow the work, to provide for your family.  Sometimes Ben would be home on weekends and sometimes not home at all for weeks at a time.  Ben sacrificed his whole life to provide for his family.  Ben was a selfless man, I can really only think of three things he ever bought for himself.  Those few things were two sets of golf clubs spaced out over 20 years and a big screen television.  Everything else he earned went to the family.  After several years of Ben working on the road, it was time for me to leave the home I grew up in.  I joined the Air Force and left Dad, Mom, Kellie, and Kerrie behind.  They were gone from my daily life but not forgotten. 

Graduation from basic training was one the proudest moments of my life.  My parents and sisters drove down to San Antonio and attended my graduation.  The pride was because while I was standing at attention, during the star spangled banner, I looked into the grandstand and saw my father, with longer hair and few more years on him, not saluting the flag like the soldier I had known for so many years, but rather I saw a gentler man with his hand on his heart.  I was proud for the person he was and the soldier he had been.  I had a tear roll down my check, while thinking to myself, that great man is my father and I am following in his footsteps. 

After about two years in the Air Force, I began to realize the values and ideals my father instilled in me as a child were real.  I was at point where I was excelling in my Air Force career and this was a testament to the love and direction both my parents provided to me growing up. 

This is the time in my life where Benny became my friend and while he will always be my father and I will always be his son, this was the beginning of a bond and friendship I will cherish for the rest of my days.  Over the years, there were marriages and grandchildren born and our little family grew into a bigger happier family. 

In 2007 I began working with Ben at MW Builders.  We had the pleasure of working on several projects together.  I was now a father to three children of my own, it was remarkable to be able to work and share this time of my life with this great man and friend.  As you all know, over the last several years Ben’s health began to fade and this past year he was approved to receive a new heart.  Ben received his heart and for reasons unknown to the Doctors, his lungs quit working.  Last Tuesday we made the toughest decision of our lives and had to let Ben go home to the Lord.  From today forward- let us not mourn Ben, but rather let us all celebrate his life and carry his memory into the future.  I will now leave him and you with a reading of the Irish Blessing:

May the road rise up to meet you
May the wind be ever at your back
May the sun shine warm upon your face
And the rain fall softly on your fields
And until we meet again, May God hold
you in the hollow of his hand